Tag: family (Page 2 of 4)

Thinking of birthdays …

Yesterday was my mother-in-law’s and my father-in-law’s birthdays. What are the odds of marrying someone who has the same birthday as you? They are both deceased; Ken (my father-in-law) died in 1989 and Doris (my mother-in-law) in 2000. Here is a picture of them taken February 1985, the same month that Kat was born.

Doris & Ken Gibson

Doris & Ken Gibson, 1985

Doris was a wonderful person who taught me a lot about how to live life and I have missed her dearly since her death.  But I find that lately, since we moved to Arizona, I have been thinking about her much more frequently.  Mostly I have been wondering if she ever forgave us for moving her grandchildren so very far away.  Our children were such an integral part of her everyday life and suddenly they were 1000 miles away and she saw them very infrequently.  I know we considered how our lives would be affected by moving, but I don’t think we fully understood the impact that our move would have on those left behind.  Now that I am in that situation, being so far from our own granddaughter, I feel a lot of guilt about taking Doris’s grandchildren so far away from her.  I’m not saying we shouldn’t have moved, or that, if we had to do it over again, that we would have done differently.  But I do think that, knowing what I do now, that I would have made more of an effort to keep Doris and her grandchildren in touch with each other.  They were young, they were busy, they didn’t like to talk much on the telephone; it is really too bad that the technology we can use now to keep in touch wasn’t available back then.  She would have so enjoyed continuing to be a part of the children’s everyday lives through Skype.

Doris & Grandchildren, 1994

Doris & Grandchildren, Thanksgiving 1994

Doris with her five grandchildren, Thanksgiving 1994.  Our three are the youngest; Bill’s brother’s two children are the others in the picture.

I think this is the very last picture of all five of her grandchildren together.  They are all grown up now and live in four different states.  Charles was four and a half in that picture!  In two months he will be twenty.  How the years do fly by!

A New Year, A New Life

Today the world celebrates the beginning of another year, 2010.  Our new year, though, began three months ago today on October 1, 2009.  If it wasn’t a new year, it was definitely the beginning of a new life.  On that day Bill and I left Tallahassee for Bill’s new job and our new life in Arizona, waving good-bye to Kat and Munchkin and David.  Our experience of three generations living together was at an end and we were embarking on a journey of rediscovering life as a couple.

2009 was certainly an eventful year.  I celebrated my fiftieth birthday in April.  Bill and I celebrated our thirtieth wedding anniversary in July.  We went through several months of Bill being home full-time while hunting for another contract or new job.  We contemplated life in such diverse places as Albuquerque, Kansas City, Nashville, Austin, Atlanta and all of Florida as Bill considered different job possibilities.  We traveled across Florida more than once and also up to Atlanta for job interviews.  And, when a job offer came, we found ourselves moved 1800 miles to a location we had never considered moving to in our wildest dreams, Arizona.

And here we are, in Sierra Vista, Arizona, feeling more than a little like Alice in Wonderland.  This is about as far removed from the tropical beach feeling that we so enjoyed; yes, we have sand and some palm trees and a lot of sunshine, but that’s where the similarity ends.  There’s no lush green, unless it’s irrigated or Astroturf.  There’s no sound of the Gulf waves crashing ashore.  And I don’t remember any snow-covered mountain peaks outside my window in Tallahassee!

While we don’t know how long we will be here, we are determined to enjoy our stay here.  We’ve taken some day trips to get familiar with the lay of the land and I will be posting some of those pictures here over the next few days.  It’s a beautifully scenic area, even if it is a stark beauty so different from that which we are accustomed to on the East Coast.

For me, though, the biggest adjustment is learning to live my life without children around 24/7.  For the first time in over 24 years I no longer have a child living in the house.  I remember when Kat moved out the first time in 2003, it took me a year to adjust to her absence, so I suspect I have quite some time yet in which to learn how to deal with their absence.  And I am sure that will be a recurring topic here at Musings, Mischief and Mayhem in the coming weeks and months.  I have even contemplated changing the name of my blog because there certainly does not seem to be much mischief and mayhem occurring here lately.  Either that or I need to do something to cause some mischief and mayhem on my own!

« Older posts Newer posts »